Lifeline: Cheer on political opponents (and squirrels) | Life style

rainy season. High 44F. North wind 15-25 m/s. 100% chance of rain. The rainfall was about a quarter of an inch. Stronger gusts of wind are possible. .
In the evening light rain, then sleet. Low 36F. West-northwest, 15 to 25 mph. 100% chance.
In the run-up to the last presidential election, the number of squirrels in the area has skyrocketed. They were pests of our bird feeders. Now because there was so much controversy over the seeds, they drove the birds away. Something must be done.
Fancy cedar poles adorned with bare cedar branches are too convenient for rodents. I lifted it off the ground and removed the bird feeder. Instead, I inserted a one-inch long steel pipe into the ground and reconnected the feeder.
I have a five gallon bucket of grease that I use for various farm equipment. I took a flat paint stirrer and applied a thick coat of lubricant up and down the pipe. This solved my issue.
After several days of trying to climb the pole and licking their bitter paws, the surly squirrels gave up. I’m not such a bad person. I still sowed seeds for them in the ground.
As the vote draws closer, the Antrim Democrats have asked me to put up political banners. It’s a way to balance each other out.
We have two acres of land on the southeast corner of Stone Circle Drive and US 31. After a steep descent from the road, there is a flat forest of small pines and wetlands in places. It was one of several reindeer crossings on our way.
Every spring I put up a poetic speed limit sign. “Cautious, reckless courtship ahead. Slow down.” Healthy.
Placing political signs is a more difficult job. Because of the steep slope, I had to drive a wooden post into the ground inside the fence. I then nailed the metal frame of the sign to the post.
It’s a lot of extra work. And since the grove is not visible from our house, these signs are often spoiled by those whom I call “night predators.”
The first time they stole my sign. The second time they plucked them from the post and threw them down the slope. There lives a large garter snake. I used a long-handled pruning saw to rip the signs out of the tall grass and nail them back.
I thought about proteins and fat. I think if this trick works with rodents, it works with predators too.
I took my paint stirrer and oiled the top and sides of the sign. For a special touch, I sprinkled the lube with green and blue glitter.
I strategically placed the cardboard on the ground next to the pointer and oiled it. That way, when a vandal steps over the fence… squashed.
The next morning, my political emblem was still in place with visible handprints. Part of the cardboard is missing.
For the next two weeks my symptoms were fine. On the morning of election day, they disappeared again. The bandits must have wised up and used gloves and garbage bags. I pulled the post out of the ground and placed it in the garden shed.
This month’s poem is written in words by Betty Dunham of the Kalkaska Elders Project. She was interviewed by a sixth grader and I wrote this poem.
I did not fly any political flags for these midterms. However, my wife and I strongly oppose attacks on the environment, public education, women’s rights, and real history. When I was in high school, reading banned books inspired me to pursue a career in poetry.
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Poet Bard Terry Wooten has been performing and writing workshops in schools for over 30 years. He is also the creator of the Stone Circle, a triple boulder ring that features poetry, storytelling and music on his land north of Elk Rapids. Visit www.terry-wooten.com for more information.
First Amendment: Congress shall not make laws establishing or prohibiting freedom of religion, or prohibiting freedom of speech or the press, or the right of peoples to peacefully assemble and petition the government for settlement of grievances.


Post time: Oct-17-2022